


on the surface

by DrunkenWhalers



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - College/University, Bisexual Connor Murphy, Bisexual Evan Hansen, Connor Deserves Happiness, Inspired by Music, M/M, Slow Burn, Slow Updates, Tutoring, deh novel canon, more specifically by borns
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-20
Updated: 2019-04-11
Packaged: 2019-11-01 09:51:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17865080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrunkenWhalers/pseuds/DrunkenWhalers
Summary: evan hansen never thought he would have to see his comatose fake best friend ever againbut alas, nothing ever goes to plan(alternatively, the au where connor did not die, but was put in a medically induced coma & ends up becoming evans english tutor in college)





	1. prologue

**Author's Note:**

> so this au has been floating around in my head for a few months now! ive always had this au for rps where Connor didnt die but was in a coma so! yeah. this is my first fic in this fandom, so please dont smite me! this first chapter is just a teaser bc i couldnt wait to finish the first chapter to post it! so it might be a few weeks before i update again. anyways, enjoy!

There were a select few things that Evan Hansen knew for sure.

  


Number one was that he was an anxious mess. Even after almost twelve years of therapy for his various mental issues, only recently around his nineteenth birthday did he began to feel even slightly better half the time. (Funnily enough that was around the time he finally got his medical marijuana card. The things smoking weed can help you with.) His sleep schedule was  **fucked** but hey, at least he slept like a baby whenever he got the chance to in between long hours  working at The Greenhouse and school.

  


Number two was that he most definitely failed his “20th Century Literature”  check up exam, despite studying hard the night before with his roommate Chris. This was due to being dumb and spending most of the semester getting into an anxious spiral over student loans, spending most of his nights smoking a bowl and trying not to have an anxiety attack over  _ how the fuck he was going to pay them off. _ Yes, he had a half scholarship courtesy of “The Connor Project” and the fuckery that was his senior year (pretending to be a comatose kids best friend is hard work), he sure as hell didn’t have the money at the time (or currently for the matter) to pay for the other half. So he bit the bullet and took out loans that he will most definitely be paying off well into his thirties. 

  


The third and final thing he knew however was shocking and he just learned it about thirty seconds ago, standing there right in his doorway. Dark and towering, it loomed over him like a stale memory from years before, tinting Evans cheeks red and filling his coffee mug up with dread. All Evan wanted was a tutor, one that could hopefully help him pass this semester of Twentieth Century Lit and what he got spoke only a few words as it stood before him:

  


“Hello, are you Mark Hansen?”

  


It was Connor Murphy, in the flesh.

  


Oh boy, this semester was going to be fun. 


	2. don't wake me (i'm not dreaming)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> evan explains himself, in a typical anxious fashion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so uhhh i finally finished this chapter ! its kind of short but i like it kinda haha. 
> 
> chapter title is from Past Lives by Borns!  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VxvCjWAf3U

When he saw the initials “C.L.Murphy” listed on the chart filled with possible tutors, Evan was drawn to it. He had no idea why, probably because the last name was sickeningly familiar. It never struck him, never crossed his mind that those initials were the same  _ exact ones  _ as connors, which makes it even more ironic that he somehow got away with pretending to be his best friend for half a year. 

 

And now here Connor was, standing right in front of him, like a deer caught in headlights.

 

“Are you Mark Hansen?” The brunette asked again, the realization slowly coming into his own view. Evan anxiously shifted in his mismatched ninja turtles socks

 

“Um, yeah that's  me…?” He forced a smile, awkward as all hell as his words trailed off. Suddenly, he began to ramble, words falling out of his mouth faster than he could string them together in his mind. “I-I’m sorry about all this the apartment is a mess and I am pretty sure that after all these years this is the last place you want to see me, I didn’t realize that it was you when I picked you!- I mean that sounds crazy but-”

 

“Slow down!” Connor let out a sigh. There was a pregnant pause. “ Evan?” He said, just over a whisper. The man in question twiddled his thumbs, avoiding eye contact.

 

“Y-Yeah thats me…” 

 

Connor took in a deep breath, whispering something to himself. He looked back at Evan, a mixed emotion in his gaze.

 

“Long time no see, am I right best friend?” The brunette snarked, his voice two toned and jaded. 

 

Evan gulped. “H-How are you?” he bit his lip, drawing little designs on the outdated shag carpeting with his foot. God, the things he wanted to say, the amount of times he wanted- no,  _ needed _ to apologize for, for the bullshit and utter mess that the Connor Project was. Alas, Evan couldn’t do more than just be a bumbling idiot, looking into Connors eyes somberly.

 

“Fine. Just great.” Connor sighed, hands in his pockets. Evan could feel something...different about him. He seemed less erratic than he did in their high school days, and sure as hell had more of an outward sense of humor. Connor stepped inside without asking, shutting the door with his foot ever so graciously. His combat boots trudged across the floor, Connor eventually sitting his ass in the beat up armchair sat by the entrance of the apartment. He smiled halfheartedly, causing Evan to gulp. “As good as someone could be when everyone is convinced they had some secret gay friendship with Evan Hansen out of all people…” Connor kicked his feet up on the little coffee table, pulling a loose cigarette out of his pocket, lighting it quickly. Evan fidgeted with his hands nervously.

 

“You can’t - um- smoke in he-”

 

“Fine. Whatever.” The brunette sighed, putting the cancer stick out on the sleeve of his jacket, tossing it in the trash beside the dark green worn upholstered chair. “Anyways, am I going to help you study or not? I am getting paid for this so I don’t really give two fucks who you are-”

 

“Y-Yeah sure um, sit on the couch, want something to drink?” Evan asked nervously, trying his damndest not to provoke the man before him. 

 

Connor smiled, eyebrows raised ever so slightly. “You got any fireball?”

  
  


\----------

 

“So, you’re telling me none of that bullshit was supposed to happen?”

“Yes, exactly.”   
“And you want me to believe you?”

Evan sighed. For the last twenty minutes, Connor had been interrogating Evan about the whole clusterfuck that had been his senior year as the brunette idly sipped a glass of cheap cinnamon flavored whiskey. He bit his lip, trying to assemble a response.

 

“Yes? Hopefully? I-I feel so bad about everything and-”

 

“Chill out, Hansen. This isn’t an interrogation” Connor reassured for about the upteinth time that evening. He ran the slim fingers of his left hand through his own burnt brown locks, tugging gently at the knots. “ I am just...curious to  _ why _ exactly you pretended to be my supposed ‘best friend and maybe possibly secret gay lover’ for months on end.” 

 

Honestly, Evan had no idea how to answer that. He could answer many questions like “What is the oldest known tree in north america?” (bristlecone pine) and “What chemicals are needed to construct chloroform?” (rubbing alcohol and bleach) but somehow could not answer the question just served to him by the lanky brunette. 

 

“I-I honestly don’t know it’s just-” He took a big breath. Goddamn this was hard. “It all happened so fast I never intended for it to  **_go_ ** as far as it did but thats what  happened and you most definitely hate me and-”

“I don’t hate you, Evan.” 

 

A pregnant silence.

 

“Really?” Evan said after around thirty seconds. He honestly didn’t know if he should believe it, here Connor was, the person he fabricated a lie about in order to get some sort of social validation, telling him that he didn’t hate Evan for royally fucking up everything in his general emotional vicinity. 

 

“Yeah, I mean i’m slightly pissed that you kinda sort of used me to get to my sister but that's more because I don’t like the idea of her dating people as she’s my baby sister, ya know? Like me and her don’t get along the best but she will always be my sister and I love her and I tend to be a bit...overprotective.” Connor chuckled dryly, taking his feet off the coffee table, now leaning inward with his elbows on his thighs. “Either way, as long as it isn’t awkward for you, I am still up to tutoring you.”

 

Evan nodded. “Yeah, um, I am  _ totally _ cool with that, wow I didn’t expect this to go over well... let me run and get my textbook!” Evan squeaked, getting up and running to his room. When he reached it, he swiftly closed the door and leaned up against it.

  
_ Fuck. _ He thought.  _ This is going to be one  _ **_hell of a ride._ **

**Author's Note:**

> scream at me on tumblr @bi-murphy


End file.
